In today’s society, many couples feel the need to live together before getting married. I disagree with this concept wholeheartedly because of my religious beliefs regarding marriage. However, it’s becoming a common phenomenon in our world, and something I feel couples should reexamine before moving in together. The Q&A below is from a marriage counseling class that I attended a few weeks ago.
The question: Isn’t living together a good way to find out more about your future spouse and learn the things that bother you about each other and correct them before marriage? I think this will help show us if we are compatible…..
The answer: You’re a man, she’s a woman—you aren’t compatible. Any questions?
Obviously, there are areas where men and women find common ground, yet I feel there is a ton of truth to the above statement. Relatively speaking, men and woman are not very compatible, which is one of the reasons why marriage between one man and one woman adds so much value for children. Each partner brings a different dynamic into the household, both of which are equally important in a young person’s development.
Although living with someone before marriage may make better sense financially and allow a couple to learn more about each other—just face it, men and woman aren’t very compatible. Part of marriage is about learning and growing from each other, while changing a part of you to get closer with your spouse. If you have already done all these things before marriage, how much growth will there be in the early years? Will you decide not to get married over something stupid when you could have worked out the problem? Will there be any spark left when it’s time to tie the knot? If you really don’t know your partner well enough to get married, will living together make up for this?